it's working.

it’s working. this sober life. that i worried would be a BUZZZZ kill. it’s delightful really. i thought i would be bored. anxious, nervous, uncomfortable, itching for a cold beverage or a smooth red, but nah…. not at all. those feelings that i worried that i would have were actually what i was dealing with WITH the drinking life. I was bored, so I drank, I was anxious so I drank, I was nervous, so I drank, I was uncomfortable, so I drank, I was itching for a something, I never thought i wouldn’t. When I dove Head FIRst into this “process”, this NOT on the menu, dones-ville way of drinking. over and out, then all that stuff dove with it. All those icky feeling left. Here I thought I would be left with those unsavory emotions and nothing to douse it with. I thought i would have all those thoughts and cravings and nothing to serve them. but they left. they must have belonged to the alcohol. cuz they left when I left. and that’s that. I am fucking happy about that.